“Today I have set before you life and prosperity, death and doom … Choose life! – Deut 30:15
On this Lenten pilgrimage towards new life with you
you invite me to deny myself, take up my cross, and follow you
Through Moses’ final instruction to the people as they enter the Promised Land
you beckon me to “choose life!”
Yet, like them, I am impatient; I complain; I don't really trust
myself or you.
I’d rather return to my old ways of being and doing,
where I am comfortable, albeit enslaved by less than life-giving choices.
It’s not yet clear to me which Lenten practices I will embrace
which vices to give up,
which virtues to take up,
so I might return to you with my whole heart.
Fasting from indifference and consumerism
so I can promote greater justice for others?
Giving alms by sharing time, kindness, care to others and the earth?
Praying to foster greater space or attentiveness to you,
to what’s deeper within me?
I believe that for something greater to rise, something lesser has to fall away.
It’s just that life-giving choices involve dying to what’s comfortable for me.
Let me lean on the solid ground
that you’re already choosing me
to create me anew in every moment,
with each breath, with each heartbeat,
offering choices to magnify life in all of us.
Let me lean on your steadfast mercy, faithful Love
that you will never leave me
though I may leave you
that you trust me
though I may not trust you
that you wait for me
to draw out greater life in me,
with you, for others.
Lord, help me choose life
choose you in me,
through the cross of whatever,
whoever I do not like and resist embracing.
Your hesitant pilgrim,